The One Who Got Away
by ice illuser
Summary: Sometimes I wonder about what could have been if I hadn't cast you off. No, I don't wonder, I know. That's what makes it so painful.


Disclaimer: I have just reread Skip Beat and have concluded it is the work of a genius

Disclaimer: I have just reread Skip Beat and have concluded it is the work of a genius. Since I'm not a genius I obviously don't own Skip Beat.

A/N: This is my first Skip Beat fanfic, so if I'm a bit off, sorry. I was rereading Skip Beat in anticipation of the anime coming out (so happy!) when I realized that my favorite parts are basically Sho's PV, and the Sho and Ren confrontations. Plus, the lines from Sho's PV really struck me, so I decided to write something from Sho's POV although I don't like him very much. (I hate him less now, as you can see since I'm not calling him Shotarou.) So let's see how this goes.

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_I have always thought that she was the one who understood me best in the whole world. _

_I also thought that I was the one who understood her best too. That is, until today. _

I don't think I know or understand you much at all now. There are some things that have stayed the same, your obsession with princesses, your desire for fancy makeup, your habit of naming things on your own, but other than that you've changed.

The Kyoko I knew never considered show biz at all.

You're now a fairly successful actress.

The Kyoko I knew was sweet and nice all the time.

You now have black miasmas popping up from behind you nearly every time I see you.

The Kyoko I knew loved me best above all others.

You now hate me above everyone else.

I know it's my fault. Somewhere along the line I let fame and fortune go to my head, and I cast you off. But you know, if you had cried that day…I could never do anything against your tears. But you didn't, and in my arrogance I let you walk off. Perhaps I thought that you would come back to me, but you never did.

I didn't regret it at first. You were gone, out of the way, and I didn't have to stop by that fancy apartment anymore or even bother to talk to you. I could stay at Shoko's place and laze around; I didn't have to bother about being nice to you. I didn't even think about you for a long time.

A long, long time.

Until you suddenly appeared in my life again. There was that chicken suit, remember? I knew it was you, but didn't manage to unmask you before you ran away. Then, you popped out of nowhere onto the TV screen, and suddenly I was seeing that short-haired girl called Kyoko everywhere.

I didn't really recognize you then. It was just a feeling, there was something familiar in that smiling girl in that ad…and I scrutinized that thing so many times that Shoko began wondering what was going on.

And then you finally appeared again for my PV, and then that's when it hit me that I _really _didn't know you anymore. Sure, I had managed to trick you into revealing your true identity, but I didn't recognize that look on your face or your words. I didn't recognize that killer aura you emitted that made Asami-san so sure you were the one who was suitable for the role of the angel who would kill the demon. And I had never known that you could be so pretty.

I had always considered you plain. A plain girl with absolutely no sex appeal but devoted to me in every way. But it's amazing what a makeup artist, a blonde wig, blue contacts, and an angel dress can do. I tried to convince myself that was all that made me continue to stare at you, but I know better now.

You've always had a charm around you, something nice about you that won people over. Well, most of the time anyway, if you worked at it for awhile. I honestly had no idea that all the girls back at school at Kyoto hated you for your close association with me. (Which I suppose shows how popular I was in the first place.) Pochi didn't like you much either, but you still somehow charmed her into performing perfectly with you in the PV.

And you even got me in the end, even when I was sure that you couldn't pull off the despair of the angel, only the evil part. You always could turn me into a statue with nothing more than your tears, and this time was no different.

After all that it was almost like what it had been, even if we were arguing and insulting each other. But then came that damn call from Tsuruga.

Tsuruga Ren. I hate him, and you hated him too, and somehow I had assumed that was still the case. Instead, he had your cell phone number, he would take time off of work to call you, and you would happily relate to him all of the day's events and fly into a mad rage if your call was interrupted by outside forces.

Why him? Why of all people did you have pick him?

I realize now what I threw away so carelessly. You used to make me laugh so hard and with you I could drop my "cool" appearance because you adored me anyway. Now I can't do that anymore.

You may deny it, but you're still the one who understands me best. You know my real name, you know I can't stand sweet things, you knew what I really felt about Vie Ghoul. (Or Beagle as you called them…that's still hilarious no matter how many times I repeat it.)

But as much as you may understand me, I don't understand you anymore. That terrifying and vengeful part of you developed after I cast you off.

I really messed things up didn't I?

I sometimes, when I'm really out of it, wonder what could have been. No, I don't wonder, I know. If I had cared for you more, if I hadn't let fame go to my head, if I had kept you by my side, you would still be here by my side, despising Tsuruga Ren as much as you despise me now.

That guy, what does he see in you? He's the top star of Japan right now (as much as it fills my soul with wrath to say that); he could have any girl he wanted. And yet he chases after the girl who plays the scariest character on Dark Moon, is oblivious to the point of delusional on all matters of romance, and is plain with no sex appeal.

Then again, what do I see in you? I ran away to Tokyo with you in tow as a servant rather than stay in Kyoto and marry you. I never believed in that crap about us being the "perfect couple." I prefer older women. And yet…

Maybe it's because I've always seen you as mine, since you were always willingly by my side. You're my servant and I can't stand to see anyone else by your side. Not that beagle and especially not Tsuruga Ren.

But I haven't lost yet. In your mind, in your heart, I occupy a greater existence than anyone else, including Tsuruga. As long as I have that, you're still mine no matter how much you may deny it and hate me. You got into show biz because of me; you would jeopardize your job (small as it was. Do you still play that chicken or did you really get fired?) for a chance to humiliate me, you become blind with rage to everything else at the thought of me.

I suppose I'm as far gone since I promised you that you would be the only one to beat me from now on. You might not have as impossible a task as I initially thought before I ever watched you act, but I guarantee you, I won't let you beat me. If you ever managed that (which you won't) what would happen to my existence in your mind? With your revenge on me complete, with that goal accomplished, would I fade away in your mind as you spend more and more time with Tsuruga?

I won't let that happen. I'll take that #1 position from Tsuruga and I'll get you back as well. I will be the one who wins in the end.

Wait for me Kyoko, keep me forefront in your mind, and keep obliviously rejecting Tsuruga. You're still mine after all.

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A/N: So…I'm not sure if I got Sho completely in character. Does he seem a bit off to you? I think he should be a bit more egotistical and less apologetic…oh well. Please review!


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